Unusual Behaviors

Consdering the study of neutral stimuli being conditioned to create previously unrelated reactions, I decided to consider a few of my own behaviors.

To start with my most common behavior is sometimes staring off into the distance with my head rested in my palm while I think. I would theorize this behavior started because ever since childhood I have been impatient ad lazy. In school, as in most organized settings, blatant disaste or disinterest is strictly prohibited. There I was frequently bored of what I had to do or simply disgusted at the ridiculously low pace at which people have to learn at. Boredom, lead to sleepiness, and since having your head down on the desk was strictly prohibited, I resorted to this habit along with slouching. Simply, my behavior was generally rewarded with some form of entertainment, in the very least me being able to relax. Being bored with nothing to do is unbearable torment for me, unless I don't want to do anything in which case I am tormented in doing things. Since I am frequently bored by life in general (I'm not mean but I'm spoiled dang it!) or by classes I often exhibit this behavior. While I rarely get any free time or something to do, it irrtiates the professors I'd assume which at least gets the message across. For example, I actually exhibited this behavior just now because I'm getting bored of typing!

The effects of this behavor is none to severe, but I do frequently rest my head on my palm, even when driving, which may not be the safest measure. Because of this,and the frequency of this habit, people aoften assume that I am easily disinterested in their projects or generally whatever they happen to be doing at the time, when in actuality I am simply just acting out of habit. In truth I do exhibit these behaviors when I am bored, but it has been become so common that I perform this behavior almost consistently.

My second unusual behavior is my fear of peronsal contact. Shocker people, I don't mind hugs but I do have issues! From elementary school early high school I was frequently picked on ( I was big and a pacifist so I suppose it made people feel better if they could try and take it out on me). Because of most of my pysical contact being pain, and potentially the fact every girl I've ever liked was either with me for a free meal or to crush me (I do know evil people) I have had personal space issues.

Ths behavior is perphaps one of my worst behaviors since it is coupled with a ingrained mentality of distrust. Combining this reason with the fact people often tell me about the "skeletons in their closet" and/or try to expose fine for public display and humiliation, I don't easily have deep rooted trust in people. Since physical contact reminds me of past injury of those who have hurt me int he past (being both physical and emotional) I have a general distaste for it. I just have had a long standing distrust of people in general ( I hide it well don't I?).

Perphaps one of my most common behaviors is my frequent and incessant blinking. Whenever I approach a huge exam, professor who I fear (I don't easily talk with authority figures), or attempt any seemingly overlooming task I always seem to blink. The basis for this is purely simple conditioning. As I recall, I have always have had poor vision (I blame genetics and video games!). Because of this I have almost always had to wear glasses. Huge glasses that make you look like a nerd, not only cause strain on the eyes, but also creates humiliatin amongst piers. In addition to allergies, these two have always been a butal combination. Since humiliation or the stress of a test or some unfortuneate event looming in the near future near by (I have bad luck), stress and humiliation quickly bcame a conditioned stimulus for such horrid reactions.

The effects of this reaction have been hard to overcome if they have even been extinguished. It prolonged me 6 months from getting my driver's liscense alone because of it. My sheer fear and stress of learning how to drive left me with horrid responses such as this. Since blinking and an allergic reaction occuring in the sinuses are detrimental to good driving, I performed poorly, which in turn led to the conditioned stimulus to continue onward. Because of this stimulus, my emotional stability has become a window to the outside world. If my eyes are blinking incessantly, and my sinuses are kicking in, it is ither severe allergies, strain from my overly huge glasses, or a sure sign I have been severely panicked or offended.